Updated: Dec 13, 2021
What would it be like to start the year off, caring less? How often do you find yourself saying "yes," when truly you want to say "no"? What if this year you said, I'm going to be selective about where and how I give my attention, focus, energy, love, advice, time, money, etc.
Let's keep it simple and intentionally select where your fucks are given!
Here are the five practices to implement to give fewer fucks.
1. Chill-out, Over-thinker!
To give fewer fucks, but let the Over-thinker feel heard, listen without reacting. Take the worrying, questioning, anxiety as a sign you've done something worth doing. Commit to the decision you made at the moment and then leave it in the past ready for whatever is coming up next. Let the Over-thinker be heard, be a part of the crew, but don't ever let them steer the ship. That's never a good idea.
2. Care-less without being Careless.
Now I'm not saying, Fuck off. I'm saying fuck less. Fuck with intention. Choose wisely what you pour your caring vibes into. Think about the relationships in your life. What connections fill you up and which ones drain you? Which ones do you go 'ugh, I don't know if I have the energy to xzy right now".
Examine those relationships, commitments, responsibilities in your life where there is only take and no return. How is this a healthy investment with your limited care vibes?
Let's care-less about those places in life that drain you and care enough about the ones that keep your engine running.
3. Set healthy boundaries.
This is for the people and things in your life that are not going to go away, but you need to find a healthy way to co-exist. Create a healthy boundary within yourself that will take care of your needs and make it safe enough to show up to that situation. Creating this healthy boundary will keep your good vibes cooking inside and has the potential to transform the unhealthy relationship over time.
In some cases, your healthy boundary will create an uninhabitable environment for this person or thing, that they will either leave or change because the inner work you are doing takes away the space from them to invade in on. It's magic!
4. Risky Business; Take risks!
As far as I know, we all have one life to live, so might as well live it. I get it, fear gets in the way and makes you want to hide away in the comfort zone, but that feeling right there is the place to challenge. The inner desire that says, "I want to be a writer, dancer, scientist, etc.". Listen to that voice. Cultivate that curiosity. Don't wait around for someone else to hear the voice and take action; you are responsible for your pathway. You are the only one that can make it happen. And yes the ego will get bruised up in the process, but it's good for the ego to get shaken up now and then.
Whatever it is, make it happen, take that risk and who knows, something magical might just happen. Or you find out you don't want to be what you always dreamt of and now you get to dream up some new ideas to test!
5. No one truly knows WTF is going on here.
I know it seems people have it together but I guarantee the people you look up to and say "wow they have it all figured out" are the ones continually questioning themselves. Social media is not helpful in this last practice. It's the quickest tool to cut yourself down a peg and compare your pathway to someone else. I highly recommend dropping this ritual. It creates unnecessary pain and suffering.
What if you decide that everyone around you is just as clueless as you and chose to give whatever is in front of you, your all. Confidently taking a step in one direction will lead somewhere. When you step into a hole and stumble, remind yourself that everyone trips and falls, and sometimes there is something down there to take note of so you stop falling on your face so much.
Life doesn't get easier; you just get a little bit better at it.
Those are the five practices I implement in my life and hope they help you in yours. It's all a bit of a trial and error, a work in progress! If you have tips, you would like to add or share how this was helpful. Please leave a note below!